[0:00] Hello, everybody, and welcome back to an absolute special episode of the Inner Power Podcast.
[0:09] Now, of course, I thank you for everyone else tuning in. And of course, if this is your first time, we've got a special treat here today because I'm joined by my lovely friend, Catherine Beck, who I'm going to introduce in a second. But I love this because Catherine, for the last decade and a bit, has been a professional voice and dialect coach, as well as along with her esteemed voice acting career. And we're going to be on here talking about a whole bunch of different things. So I just want to say, first and foremost, thank you so much for your time, Catherine, and welcome to the pod.
[0:48] Oh, well, thank you very much. I'm so pleased to be here. So it's i have to admit when i met you it was like oh how exciting because i've always loved obviously imagination and i've loved voices a lot of people and everything and then all of a sudden i've met katherine i'm like oh this is this is the real deal she's the real deal and i was like ever since meeting katherine like katherine's been so lovely to kind of go pete you need to slow down on your podcast people can't understand your accent when you're in full flow or channeling i'm like i know i can't help it but it's lovely and it's lovely to have you here and we've obviously connected through uh our professional journey our business journey and whatever else but just so our listeners can get a feel for it because it's not every day we get to speak to someone like yourself like katherine you've been on well we can hear your voice on certain radio stations, I think you were talking about there how you are the voiceover for, I think it's a train station or a train network. Is that correct? Well, in terms of radio stations, you can hear me in Singapore on KISS 92.
[1:57] I have been the voice of an airlines called Goal Airlines. So if you've traveled on that airline, you would hear me do all the flight safety information on that. How cool is that? See, I love that because I listen to so many flight demonstrations. I feel like I need to fly on Goal Airlines now just to hear your voice. I know her. I know. I want to travel too.
[2:22] For many years, I did a lot of animation. So there's a whole generation that knows my different characters that I did on a variety of different TV shows. And that, speaking of animation, is where you get to play for work, which is so much fun, and create these characters and be five years old. And you can be one day, you can be a little girl. Another day, you could be a witch. Another day, you could be playing these vultures coming out from the sky and attacking the main characters. It's so much fun. So I did that for many years. These days, I do more commercials and corporate work. So it's always changing. And I suppose that's kind of nice if you like your work to be fluid, to be changing up on you and keeping it interesting so lots and lots of things but obviously through this too and this is where it's kind of really legitimate and where you're very well known for and very respected in that field now of being the voice and dialect coach and just for those who are on the uninitiated it was nice because obviously just before we jumped in the recording you gave me that quick briefing and i'm like oh wow that's a very powerful and important distinction but for those who are unaware. Just can you give us a breakdown? What's the distinction obviously between obviously voice and dialect coaching?
[3:47] Yeah. So obviously your voice is your vocal instrument. It's what you use to speak every day. But with your voice, we all come from different parts of the world. So we all have a different accent. So accents and dialects, when we speak to that, that's a particular way of speaking that is characteristic of where you're from. Now, a dialect coach typically is hired by an actor or maybe a production company to work with the actors on a particular accent or dialect. So when I moved from Hollywood to Sydney, Australia, 19 years ago as an actor, and I thought, how am I going to book work over here if I don't sound Australian, I worked with a dialect coach so I could learn the Australian accent so I could book roles over here. Oh my god, you didn't you actually went and learnt the Australian accent? Yeah, yeah, and it took me a year to perfect it so that I could book.
[4:49] Australian roles. And it was in that journey of going through that struggle that I really learned the difference between the two accents. And I learned where a lot of actors were failing and struggling. And so all of a sudden, agents actually were saying, hey, can you teach my actors the American accent over here? And I said, sure. And so my first business outside of being an actor evolved into becoming a dialect coach for non-U.S. Actors who wanted to master the American accent so that they could book U.S. roles. But what happened was being an online entrepreneur, delving into that world, I started to meet a lot of other online entrepreneurs. And looking at the online space and all of these content creators, course creators, putting themselves out there on social media or creating webinars or different events where they're showing up on camera, creating content, and seeing how much they were struggling with that, both in their physical and their vocal presence. And so I had this strong pull to help support then online entrepreneurs.
[6:09] In their presence, their vocal and physical presence, so that they could captivate and capture the attention of their audiences, so that they could increase their visibility, increase their sales, and all of that. So there are very similar and yet differences between the two. And I look at it as like, what's your outcome? What do you want to achieve? And then And from there, we go deeper into the voice and then the accent or the dialect. And it's amazing to say, like, you've come from Hollywood to Sydney, like, learning the Australian accent. I don't know of anyone else I've heard ever say they wanted to learn the Australian accent.
[6:53] But that's a first for everything. And then what a way for the tables to be turned to all of a sudden, you know, you've got agents kind of coming around going, well, could you possibly, you know, hey, help our actors, you know, master the American accent so they get to those roles? And that's kind of legit to that. And now, like, and now you're saying this is where it's really important because
[7:14] this is where we're going to take this lovely turn here because it is like the online space. Now, this is interesting. We've got to get into this journey because we're going to be talking about a really big word in a moment. And that word is Dharma. And we're going to break that down. But obviously, we need to have context and understanding to really understand this meaning and feeling of Dharma. But in this journey, would you have ever considered yourself to be or was it on your radar to be an online entrepreneur?
[7:51] Well, I've always been an entrepreneur. So I started probably around nine, I'm guessing, with my first business, which was a jewelry making business. At the age of nine. Yeah, yeah. So my mom dabbled in making jewelry. She taught me, she took me to places where I could, you know, buy the materials and start making it. And I really loved it. And she had a boutique and she would take me to the, when she would go buy for the store, she would take me with, and I would, you know, show her what I liked as well. And so she and I had this idea of creating a corner of the boutique called Catherine's Corner where I could buy things for kids my own age and sell them. And so I started doing that and it took off and people would come in and they would buy things from my corner, you know, kids my age, but then also parents of kids and things for birthday parties and whatnot. And then I would also sell my own jewelry there as well. So that was my first stint as being an entrepreneur. I did really well. I was in the local newspaper. And then I got bored with it because I was a kid.
[9:13] The kid, but that's also the entrepreneur trouble, isn't it? We've discovered it. It's like if anybody's the entrepreneur, you will know that pain too well. It's like, okay, this is really exciting. This is really good. And then you're like, okay, I'm bored of that. What's next? What's next? And I'm thinking, imagine the entrepreneur with a kid. Yeah.
[9:33] Yes, exactly. But yeah, so then around the same time, I discovered my love for stage. And so the stage and wanting to perform took center stage. And so I found myself no longer doing Catherine's Corner and creating jewelry and focusing on acting. And that was my love from that moment onward. I was like, Broadway Academy Awards, this is it. And so I was hyper, hyper focused, if not obsessed with acting. And that was it. So, you know, even as an actor, you are an entrepreneur as well. So, I think I've always been an entrepreneur. Yeah. I think it's genetic.
[10:22] Once you've tasted it, it's very hard to not do it. And I think one of the values of an entrepreneur is just resilience and the willing to just keep going, keep trying. Like you said, I could see how that would be very relatable to someone who's working on stage or as an actor because, you know, it's a very, very hard, you know, industry to maintain constant work. So, you're constantly going. So, you have to push yourself really, don't you? Yeah. Yeah. Because you're always seeking that next job, that next line of work. So, and you're also sometimes reinventing yourself as well. Like you're always looking for different angles and different ways. And so. It's very much, you know, you are an entrepreneur because you're not, even though you're working for someone else, it's short term. You have to really be a commander of your own ship and where you're setting sail because otherwise it's very easy to get lost at sea. Yeah.
[11:28] And this is where like even hearing you say that, that's from like even for myself in the most recent journey, which we're going to kind of fast forward and bring ourselves a little bit more to the present, where it's just nice to connect with people of like mind, similar situations, because it's like you don't feel as lost at sea. And it's nice to have that support network around you. Now, coming back there, you said you were hyper-focused on, obviously, the stage acting. Like you said, it's Broadway, it's Emmys. This is what I want. This is where I'm going.
[11:59] Now, this is where we're going to bring up because this is interesting. Kind of going back there, you've got this hyper-focus. Now, let's have a look at this lovely word, Dharma. Because this is, I love this because Catherine and I have been kind of in the trenches, the entrepreneurial trenches a little bit together. And we've been like, this word's been floating around and I almost want to say haunting, if that's the right word. It's just kind of like, you know, we are going one way and then kind of come back another way. We're just figuring things out like you were saying, like we're always constantly reinventing ourselves. How's this going to happen? Now, when we have a look at the word Dharma, for you, what does the word Dharma symbolize or mean for you? Well, I asked myself, I was asking myself that. There's the curveball, people. There's the curveball.
[12:53] I've been stuck on that word for a long time. And the closest thing that came to it was purpose. And I was like, well, what's purpose? Because so when you ask that, I was like, okay, well, what's coming up for me? Like, what is it? And it was like there was like a candle lit up inside of me. And that's all I can think of is like, what is that thing that lights me up that speaks to my soul? And maybe that can change over time or it evolves over time. But what is that thing that you know is like, it's like you need in order to survive and thrive each and every day. And I got lost off of that path for quite some time but what it always comes back to is I think of that moment that first moment that I stepped on stage and I could feel those stage lights on me and the energy from the audience and I knew it felt like I was home Like I found my place. That's my happy place. And so if I can equate anything to Dharma is me in the spotlight, but it's not me, which means I'm performing. I'm not being myself. So that would be my Dharma.
[14:14] Nice. I like the way you've kind of, I can even see you there literally reliving that first memory of you being on stage. And I get to see like you're right there and that.
[14:25] Little smile just kind of came over your face you're in that moment and I love that because it's just so beautiful when you have it you can't escape it because it's so centered you know within and kind of having that and I think you make a very good point there too with the fact of it might start somewhere your candle might you know light up at one point but the way that it might flicker or whatever else it can change over time and it's interesting how it's like it leads you into this you know the stage is there and it's also i think for yourself as you're saying in your journey now like you're still connected to the stage and you're still helping like so many people with stage it was the reason why we've had to kind of delay this recording getting this podcast because you were literally on set and on stage helping people at the same time so it's definitely there and connected for you but what I want to bring in here is I think it's very important especially with the the time and the energy that's of late and this happens not just at this point in time this is going to happen for so many people at so many different stages but you were saying that you're feeling a little bit lost would that be the right way to describe it with where you're at you felt like the passion had disappeared for what you were doing.
[15:45] I felt, well, in my business, I felt lost for quite some time. Like I was searching for something, searching for happiness, searching for success.
[15:56] And I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I couldn't quite get there. And it was like the more that I tried this and then that, it felt like the further I was getting away from what I was searching for.
[16:13] Yeah. I love this. We're going to get into this.
[16:19] Because I'm like, oh, this is the juicy stuff. Because it is. Now, I like the way you said that in terms of you went searching for it.
[16:28] And then the more you searched for it, the further away that you kind of ended up. I can totally relate to that because obviously we've been sharing a very similar journey in that of like what's kind of going on. and the feelings are very, very different. And I like that. It's like it's in the business sense because business is an extension of our personal life, especially when it's connected to us and we're doing it. So, that importance on having happiness and success in the business, I think, is very, very important because it's interlinked. But as you started losing this, now when you're saying you're searching for this next thing or, you know, where that happiness might now be or where that success might happen, when you're searching for that, would you say that you were literally like in your being logical about it, pragmatic about it? Were you kind of feeling into it? How were you going about this searching if you can? I know this is a real like, I don't even, I'm thinking how do we work? I'm thinking, I'm asking this question. I can't phrase it correctly. I'm thinking, is Catherine going to be able to phrase it? Well, I can answer it for you. The more I searched, the more it just became fear-based.
[17:46] Oh, so can you extrapolate on that? So if anything, I was in my head, I was not in my body, I was in my head and I was overthinking. And it got less about, it even got less about being happy. And it was more about how can I make this a success? The more I struggled and the more I thought about it, it was just like, I just gotta, I gotta find the one thing that's gonna, you know, be my million dollar business. Like, what is that strategy? What is that plan? Maybe if I try this, maybe if I try that, I'll try this. And then all of a sudden I found myself with 5,000 different projects and I was... I laugh because I'm like, oh, look, you're preaching to the choir. Yeah. And I got to the point where I was so stressed out and so burnt out that I just had to stop everything and just take a breath. Yeah. Not do anything and go, what do I want to do? Like, this is clearly not it. And if anything, I'm in a worse place financially because of this. So, I got to figure my shit out.
[19:03] And I suppose there's also like, I got to figure this shit out pronto. Yes. It's like, you know, because we are our business and if things are not going, you know, fantastically well, it's like, okay, what's going on? So, and I like that because there's a big distinction there, as you're saying, like, you know, you're probably more in your head, you're trying to figure things out and you end up creating things and trying things, but not necessarily really aligned with yourself at that time. Would that be correct? Yeah, I think you get to a point where you don't even know anymore who you are or what you want or how you feel because you've detached so much from it. At least that's how it was for me. And what I realized is that, and this came from a conversation I had with our, we have a fellow coach in common that we both know, James, had once said to me, this was December of 2022. He said when we were having a conversation about what I should do, it's taking a while to get there. But basically, he said something to the fact of you can do whatever you want, but you can't turn your back on your dharma. And what I realized that I had been trying to do for many months is turn my back on my dharma.
[20:32] I was trying to reinvent myself, thinking, well, I don't think I can be successful with the path that I've created for myself. I had this belief that I couldn't be successful as an actor to the level of success that I wanted.
[20:48] I couldn't be successful solely working with actors to the level of success that I wanted. So it was time to close the door on all of that and open up a new door.
[21:01] That's a really hard decision to kind of come to, isn't it? Like, it's been such a big part of your life and here you are going, well, that's clearly not working. Yeah. So, it's time to close the door, you know? Yeah, it was. Well, it was. And so, the door was never fully closed. So, this door was still slightly ajar.
[21:23] I've got my foot in the door. It looks like it's closed. Which is why I had 5,000 things going on. But the intention was, I'm going to pivot. I'm going to just work with online entrepreneurs. I'm an online entrepreneur. That makes sense. You know, I enjoy it so much. I enjoy working with entrepreneurs and there's so much potential there. And so what if I can find a way to utilize my skills to help them? And what I noticed is I really struggled to figure out the messaging and what that one program or thing was that lit me up that I wanted to teach to online entrepreneurs. So I really struggled with figuring that out. And I noticed it was really hard to show up on social media. I started a new podcast. It was hard to get the downloads. Everything felt really hard, even though I knew that I could help them so much. And in my mind and my body, I was like, oh, I can tell them exactly what to do and they'll have great results. And I see that in my one-on-one clients. When I work with a one-on-one online entrepreneur, the results I can get are instant and their results are so transformative in their business. So I'm like, okay, I've got the success, I've got the results, but why can't I get this going?
[22:48] And I realized was because that isn't my dharma. Like you can be really good at things, but that doesn't mean that it's going to give you that spark, that light. And so if you turn your back on the thing that gives you that spark, then everything else is going to feel really dull and dim. And so I got to the point where I was like, I will always have to have acting or working with actors as my main thing. I can't turn my back on that. I can't just have the door ajar. And if I want to work with entrepreneurs or anyone else, I can have that door ajar for them, but that's not my primary. So I basically had to flip the model of what I was trying to do before because I was trying to snuff out my dharma, basically.
[23:44] Even though it's bizarre, it sounds like it's been there in front of you. Always. Almost the whole time, and yet we feel like it's something else or it should be something else because things aren't quite working out or we hit that kind of patch. But I think it's really important here to highlight the fact, and I'm just going to bring you back here a second because that was a really great description because you're talking about how it really felt. And I think this is where I really wanted to get you on because this is huge. Like Catherine knows this because I've probably over told Catherine how much like so in the group, whatever, because we've been in the trenches about this together for a while. We've been bouncing off and helping each other through this because I was very much in the same boat. It was the same thing of like something's like you just it's hard when all of a sudden the passion or that spark and that life of what you have been doing for a long time just sudden how disappears it's it's really weird because like it just kind of dissipated it's not like one day it just stopped it's just like all of a sudden something's either missing or something's not quite right but you know at the time when you're experiencing it you don't know how to fully describe it to someone unless they're either going through it or have been through it themselves. And you're describing this, and I think this is important because if anybody's listening and they're in a very similar situation.
[25:06] To pay attention to, like, for lack of a better word, the symptoms that you might be suffering that are alluding to the fact that you might be.
[25:17] Like, searching or going down a path that may not help you to discover it. And you're saying how, like you you were good at this like you know you could help it and this is the other thing too katherine's a voice and dialect coach now watching her work with people which i've seen live at events where we're talking in front of a thousand people she just pulls them aside do this do this do this this and she's like and the person's like okay and it is honestly that the speaker just jumps into a whole new like spectrum of confidence and like i've got this and it's like just like, instantaneous like 30 seconds to 60 seconds transformation that's how powerful katherine is when she's working one-on-one and to a point where you're like i love this i've seen the transformation in them i'm really really good at this but it's not leading it's like but then you're like cool let's do this offer but you're saying what the symptoms were the message wasn't flowing you couldn't create hard to convey what i do you know sometimes it can be easier to convey more tangible things, but when it comes to voice and the transformation, it's hard to say to somebody, I can hear...
[26:25] What is happening in your mind every time you speak yeah you know and and i can shift that for you so that you can get more sales you know what i mean like that's it's hard things to convey to explain yeah and also it's situational you know i have this reputation of what i do and i'm so good at what I do with the actors and it's very much needed and it's very unique the way I teach it as well that it's just got so much potential and it's so very much needed. The voice work that I do with other people, you have to communicate it to people because it's not something that they're actively searching and going, I want to work with a voice coach.
[27:15] My thoughts are affecting how I speak, which are affecting my sales. People aren't thinking about that. So I've got to shift their perspective so that they understand why they need to work with me. The other thing, people are coming to me and saying, I need to work with you. How can I work with you? And so it got to a point where I was like, I've got things going on in my life personally, where I just don't have the time or the energy right now to basically start up all over. It's not like you're starting all over again, but build that communication and visibility and have that conversation about what I do.
[28:01] Now's not the time. I'm too tired for that. I'd rather focus that on maybe speaking on podcasts or getting invited to do a live event somewhere or referrals. But it doesn't have to be my primary point of focus because I can see that this other area is literally calling my name. The amount of emails that I get And, you know, all the time where people are coming to me versus a whole nother part of the industry where people don't know who I am and I've got to put myself out there. I don't know. Maybe it's the projector in me, like my human design is I'm a projector. So we wait for the invitation. Like that just works really well for me, you know? Yeah.
[28:56] I had to come to the conclusion of I spent all this time trying to flip the model and go back to the original model, but now this time create a new model that really works for me and makes me happy versus what I was doing before, which was just creating something based on how I was told how to create it from signing up for somebody's course and teaching me how to create a course. And this is how you create an online business. Now I was at a point of like, okay, if I'm gonna go back and do this, how can I create this business model for myself where it lights me up and excites me to wanna do this? And so that's where I came back to, okay, I'm gonna have the actors be my primary.
[29:46] And anyone else, like the entrepreneurs, anyone else that I work with solely one-to-one And so, I can really enjoy that time just one-to-one and get amazing results and have that gratification of working with others that way. Yeah. And it's a good way to kind of describe that because you're talking about they're obviously getting a little bit in flow with things. And that flipping part is the hard part because I think we're always looking for something.
[30:15] And kind of coming back to the symptoms, it's interesting. Like you're looking at this developing the speaking program or helping more people to speak and whatever else but also and i want to bring up here because i was going to say be careful people because katherine is the real deal and there's like in my world we have the thing called you're a soothsayer well katherine's like that because everything every little voice every little word every vowel every every piece of dialect katherine's like nope there's hesitation there like yeah so you can't hide from but also i katherine hears everything i hear it all and i I don't think I knew that I had special gifts until I met you and I met this other woman named Lindsay through this mutual group that we're a part of that I realized, oh, I've... Intuitive and highly highly yeah like i didn't know that i just thought i thought i was a really good actor i thought it came from acting and i was just a really good actor like i'm really present i am but i came to become aware that like my level of awareness is on a whole nother level and a lot of times when i you know i do a lot of self-tape reviews for my actors a lot of times I'll just close my eyes and I'll just listen and I can hear exactly like where the voice is placed and where it's the vocal energy is directing and exactly what's happening inside their mouth without looking at them.
[31:42] I can, yeah, I can hear hesitation. I can hear doubt. I can hear exactly what's going on in somebody's mind. I can hear what's holding them back. I can hear when they're pushing. I can hear everything. But I can also see it too because I, again, and I watch so many self-tapes.
[32:02] So I can see what's happening as well. But I do know that my most in-tuned sense is my ear, for sure. Oh, and that's me. It has been magic to watch you work with people because it's just instantaneous when you're aware of it. Now, your ear is that thing, and obviously voice is so important, but it's interesting here too because when you finally came to the realization of like you've been searching, you're looking for something, but almost like you'd discovered you'd almost turned your back on your dharma. Part of that process was you're saying that there was a lot of heaviness with where you were and then in your own words, you actually said you also felt a voice block. Oh, yeah. And I'm thinking, isn't that, I find like that's ironic in full terms. Here you are as a voice person, but as you're going through this journey, you encountered this voice block. Is that something that you really felt physically or was that something more cognitively like you couldn't get that flow or as a combination of the both? It wasn't physical, like I can use my voice whenever I want to. That's not a problem. It was more of, yeah, there was like an internal block that was holding me back from speaking and showing up.
[33:25] And it was really prominent after I spent the first three months of the year thinking, oh, I figured it out. It's a public speaking course and I'm going to create it. And I, you know, welcomed in the first group and then I went to go launch it again and I had zero interest or desire to show up on social media and talk about it. I couldn't I had no clue what I would say, even if I was going to create content about it. I had no desire to pitch it. And I'm like, well, this is weird. What what just happened here? Like, why why do I have a voice block? And this is a public speaking course. I should be able to speak about it. Right. Like it just made no sense. And then I was talking to someone and I said, I made this course also because, you know, I come from like having a fear of public speaking. I've always been great at performing on stage and being other characters. But speaking, you know, there's always been this underlying fear. And this person said to me, so why are you doing a public speaking course? I was like.
[34:32] When you put it like that good question and so then i was like huh and look i can't even get myself to talk about it on social media this is strange and so that's where it kind of like started is maybe i got the sign wrong like in december i got a sign for stage i'm supposed to be doing something on stage. But maybe it wasn't that I was supposed to be helping people speak on stage. I think that was almost like my ego tricking me into thinking that that was where I was headed. But really, it was me getting back to my dharma, which was stage. It's fascinating you bring that up because I've told you about this before, having that very similar experience where like this thought for me, it's a little bit more dramatic than that. Like it's actually a voice like coming from beyond. So it's like, there's no denying it when it happens. And like, and I, I stepped off stage back in, yeah, 2020.
[35:40] 23, 22, no, because 18 months, something like that. But anyway, I remember it and it was just like, you're done with this. And I think it's not so much, I just want to clarify there because I don't think it is our ego necessarily tricking us. I think it's just the fact of when we receive those insights or signs, as you were saying, it's all our brain does is work with the context it's given at the time. Yes, exactly.
[36:07] Yeah. And so, because I suffered the same consequences as you on the same thing. I'm like, oh, okay. Well, I'm like, really? Like, I'm done with this. I'm done with being on stage and I'm done with talking to live audiences, even though this is the thing that I've been doing for a long time and this is the thing that I've enjoyed for a long time. And it did. It really took the wind out of my sails and you start going, oh, okay. And that kind of gets you thinking on a totally different tangent and path. But come full circle and many months later.
[36:41] I have now come to realize it was a context issue and that was just my fault because when we are receiving these signs, receiving these insights or these beautiful subliminal messages that are coming from beyond all from within ourselves, it's not always about the context our physical brain at time takes the context that we're in but the whole thing is we will only ever hear them when we're ready to hear them and it's almost like because you're open to hearing it and that means it drops in at the time that you're willing to listen but it doesn't mean it's that sign or that word is meaning for you right then right there about that thing that's the hard part about working with the energetics because you're like okay cool i'll hear this and this is what i'm feeling oh okay time to change and you and you trust it you go with the flow only to find out that you yeah you you go searching off away from your dharma.
[37:41] Great i mean as painful as that whole experience is when you i guess take the the wrong you you you take a detour and you think you're going on the right path, but you're not, is once you go down that path and you hit that dead end, you're like, okay, I get it now. Now I understand where that sign was taking me and it's clearly not here, it's over there. And then you can feel the difference between the two and then you can start to feel, oh, actually this does make me happy. And so how can I, do more of this so it makes me even more happy. And I love how you always come back to happy. Like, I love this. The whole time we've been talking, you're always kind of like, this was like leaving me happy. And then, oh, but your happiness dwindled. But then I had to come back to the happiness factor. And it's interesting because I'm a bit like that myself, whereas, and it took me a while. Like, I think it was only, what, a couple of months ago. So, what mid-year and probably more so April, May. And I was like, well, hang on.
[38:49] Things are a little bit out of control. I was very similar. Like, here's this, do that, do that. I know there's so many people. I know I'm doing a lot of travel, but a lot of people are going, I can't keep up with you. Most people don't even realize that I'm actually from the Gold Coast because it's like, they're like, I'm traveling so much that we don't even know where you're from. But I was doing so much as well that it's like hey hang on is this really where i want to be is this really what i be doing because is this like not just like success is one thing but it's most like but in here is this filling my cup is this making me happy and this is this providing me with what i want in my life at this point in time and then you start to have those realizations and i like you're saying it's it is crappy and it's and i'll like both of us will both agree like you really don't wish this upon anyone what we've just been through like it's like purgatory to be honest isn't it yeah it's just like you you honestly you think you're bipolar a little bit because one week you're like that's it and like hey catherine you've got your you've got your speaking but awesome i love it it suits you it's you're highly intuitive you're good at this and you're like yeah And then like two weeks later, like, nope, it's not working. It's not happening. Pete, it's crap. I haven't got the words. I've got no one coming. I don't know what to do. And it's like.
[40:15] Yeah. You think people must look at you like you're crazy because now you've been doing it for years. And they just, it's like the boy who cried wolf. Like they can't trust what you say anymore. Yeah. And that's huge. And like, oh, that's me. I've been speaking to my audience, which, you know, I've been building up, you know, over 10 years. And, you know, I've openly admitted here on the podcast and previous episodes about this journey, about kind of doing it. And I've also had the same thing of like, there's just points when you're on this, call it the journey, but it's more like a washing machine, let's be honest, because you feel like, cool, I'm going to get started on this. Then all of a sudden you go, cool, let's move. I've got to get it out there. Let's go to social media. And just like you're saying, nope, I... Can't talk about this i don't know why i'm and for me i know in my heart of hearts i do not like turning up on social media unless i can be fully present and authentic with what i'm doing i just there's something in me i'm like i can't do the whole pretense thing i just that's not me uh so sometimes that's why you know if anybody's listening you're going yeah i was wondering why you weren't on social media for like i haven't seen you for like a couple of weeks it's It's literally because the internal journey is happening big time.
[41:38] So, it is like, once I come out of it, then you'll be sick of me because I'll be everywhere once it starts to happen, you know, happening like that. So, you know, I love this because I love you sharing, you know, what you've kind of been through as well because it just shows people that it's okay to have these thoughts. It's okay to like look at a change, but it's also okay to change your mind again from changing your mind. Yeah. To say to come back to what it is. That's the hard part is being okay with changing back. And I think you said something to me when I was going through it and I said something about like, oh, it's just so hard to like go back again. And you said, well, it's not that you're going back. It's that you're going full circle.
[42:28] And I was like, oh, that's an interesting way to think about it is because that's more of that journey, you know, think of like the hero's journey or any sort of journey is like you go through these stages where you learn these lessons and you become a better person because of it. And then you're able to grow because of it in your life, in your business, in your soul, in helping others in a way that you couldn't quite do if you hadn't
[42:56] gone through the journey. And so while the journey is hard and it's not meant for everyone, and it's only the strongest that will survive the journey, if you can, you are one of the few incredible souls that can tell the tale and truly help others in going through that journey.
[43:17] While you're talking about that, through this journey, was there any point in time where you were just ready to give up, chuck it in, stop? Oh, God, yeah. I mean, you'd have to be a robot not to. You know, like, it's hard. Like, there's so many times where I was like, I'm over this. I'm done with it all. I'm just going to pack up and be done. And that's especially because when you go through this and you start removing things out of your income and also creating space so you can think, so you're working less, you have less commitments, less money coming in, you suddenly feel like, I don't even know if I can keep the doors open.
[44:06] And, you know, like it gets to that point. And I've heard that from quite a few people recently as well that are going through a similar thing. And so you get to the point where it's like, well, I just I've got to just have faith that if it's going to happen, things will come into my world. Like, I never gave up hope that something wouldn't come into my world that would keep me going financially. I would be able to keep the doors open, but to remove as much as I could so that I could have that space to figure it out, figure out what I wanted and how it looked. And so when I started to get that first vision of, well, what would light me up and what would be fun and easy to do and that I could talk about and people did, you know, were really, really interested to learn from me. The scariest part was, I guess, like seeing the vision, but then acting on it. Because if you start to have a vision that's bigger than you or bigger than anything that you've done before, the hardest part is to take those small steps towards achieving that vision because it'll be very easy.
[45:25] Like there are many moments where I was like, I can't do this. Like, oh, I can't. Fear. Overwhelmed. Yeah, like increasing my prices and creating, you know, a bigger outcome and hiring coaches and, you know, stepping out of my old self and the old way I used to do things and stepping into this new identity and this new program that was an entity. Like it's, it's something that isn't just me. It's like, it's got its own thing going on that like you could potentially, you know, at some point remove me and the whole thing exists without me versus things that I did before. It just felt like I had to do everything. Yeah. But yeah, it is scary. You know, there were many times where I wanted to just like, like quit everything, but I I guess because I started my entrepreneurial journey at nine, it's all I've ever known. I'm not a quitter.
[46:35] If anything, I'm stubborn and I will not back down until I figure it out. I don't know how many times my wife's called me stubborn over the years. You're just stubborn. It's like, well, you know what? I credit that to keeping me going and allowing me to be where I am thanks to that stubborn streak. Like, so, but it is, and that's, I mean, again, I think it's beautiful that you can share that and say, of course, it's going to happen.
[47:03] And what was, what's the thing when you have those moments, you're having those thoughts and you're hitting some serious lows. And this means it's not just like your business, it's your life because it's such entertainment. What's the thing that really just keeps you going or what's that thing that just gives you that little ray of hope when you're having those moments? I think, like, I think of that as my business rock bottom. Like, if you're hitting some sort of rock bottom in your life, it feels like it can only go up from here. Like, it can possibly get worse. There's the entrepreneurial spirit.
[47:42] It's coming through in space. Right? And so it's like, if I've hit my lowest, then what would it look like if I hit my highest? And wow, how good does that feel? And it can't get it like I've now experienced how crappy it can go by doing all the things I probably shouldn't have done. So maybe I've gotten all of that out of my system. And now it's time to actually do the thing that scares me and lean into it. Because what's the worst thing that could happen? Somebody says, no, I'm not going to join your program or no. Like, I've already experienced the worst. So I might as well just go for it now because if it's not going to be fun, the whole experience, even like pitching to people and selling and all of that, if it's not going to be fun and if there's no passion behind it, the dharma is not there, then what's the point?
[48:39] Yeah, and I've noticed you've said this multiple times now, and I really want to highlight this for obviously the listeners and people who are watching, is you've really come back a lot to how you want your business and how you want your life to feel, not just – if you've noticed, guys, and I just want to really highlight this. You know even though we have mentioned lovely words of like you know this this is business and this is success but you would have noticed that in all this time not once have we talked about a money figure like it's more coming back down to how you want this to be and you would say that your feelings you see you're saying it felt heavy at some point feeling like this and so now you've mentioned a couple, but if you were to list the qualities that you're really looking for in like your business and your life, what would they be? Well, definitely freedom. I think that's a big one for a lot of entrepreneurs is to have that freedom and independence to, you know, like.
[49:47] Take the day off, make my own schedule to, you know, go out and go on a walk if I want to, not feel tied down to working several hours a day, which is what I found myself doing. And I was like, my God, I'm doing the thing that I didn't want to be doing. And I found myself doing it. I was like chained to my desk. So freedom is a big one. I mean, I've said happiness. So, you know, feeling that, you know, fulfillment of being happy and content and, and what I'm doing, which connects to the Dharma.
[50:22] And, and, And creativity, obviously, is another big one for me for the, you know, the performing. And another one is I've always been very much an out-of-the-box thinker. So, innovation, like providing something that's going to help others in a way that hasn't been done before. I love that. And that will kind of lend itself to the freedom aspect as well. So, you have the ability and time and space to implement, create, and play almost because when I've got that, I know it's almost like a play. I want to see how this goes. I want to experiment with this. And again, that's a little bit of the entrepreneurial streak that likes to come out and play from time to time. But I love that. And I kind of like just looking at this overall.
[51:12] If looking at this whole journey that you've been on, like this full circle moment, you're kind of coming back around and you've done the hero's journey here. What would be your advice or your lovely words of wisdom for anybody who is listening to this right now and is like saying to themselves in their mind going, oh my God, this woman's in my head. Like this is, how is this possible? This sounds so like me right now. What would be your lovely words of wisdom for anyone who is feeling like they are going through what you've been through? Know that there is a light at the end of that tunnel and the fog will clear and you will see the path. Give yourself the space to be in the silence, in the darkness. Because the answer will come and that light will get closer and closer.
[52:14] I love it. And one thing to finish off with, we're going to finish off on a high.
[52:18] What is Catherine's big dream and what does Catherine want to be known for? Where is the Dharma shining here? Well, the big dream, again, the first thing that pops into mind is stage. So I see myself back on a stage, a big stage performing. I don't know when or where that will be, but I see that. What do I want to be known for? For, I'm always my client's biggest cheerleader. So I want to be known for being the voice and helping others to amplify their voice, whether it's, you know, performing or speaking to show up and be proud of who they are and own their voice.
[53:09] Love it. Love it so much. There's some beautiful words of wisdom and some amazing inspiration to help others kind of just stay focused and not give up on yourself. So on that note, Catherine Beck, a.k.a. The Beckinator, if you need help, you can search her up on LinkedIn and socials and she can help you out if something's on that line of things. But thank you so much for being not just on the pod, but being so open, honest, and vulnerable about this journey because it's a rough one. It's not the easy one. And I believe that we need more conversations and we need more voices and stories like yours to be told. So, again, I just want to say thank you so much for taking the time to share it with us. Thanks so much. My pleasure. Thanks for having me.
